And less than 24 hours after the last post comes episode 4! Fun, eh?
At the start of the last episode, we were on Day 1. Now we’re on Day 6. Talk about covering ground. So when we last left off, Frankie had just lost his status as one of this week’s HoHs. He’s most likely safe, but Donny and Pow Pow are most certainly not. This has made Donny super bummed because he and Pow Pow have now gone from teammates to enemies. Donny starts to get super emotional, not because he’s on the block and possibly going home, but because people are being nice to him! Ugggghhhh my heart is breeeaaakkiiinnnggggg. Pow Pow’s actually being super nice. Maybe I misjudged her? Nah, probably not. Oh, and apparently Donny is 42, not 33 like I said yesterday. So… whoops? Unfortunately, things are not looking good for Donny. Caleb… I can’t believe I’m saying this… Caleb actually believes that Donny is a threat. Donny. The guy who is crying because people are nice to him. Donny. A threat. Wow. Looks like Donny is the Bomb Squad’s target this week. Devin thinks it’ll be easy to make happen since he has such a huge influence on everyone in the house, what with his charm and charisma. Ugh, Devin. Unfortunately, the one person he does have a huge influence on is Donny. He’s still super emotional because of how everyone in the house is treating him (he thinks they’re treating him good. Poor guy has no idea.). Devin’s just… rolling with it. Acting like he’s still on Team Donny. Devin’s convinced that Donny is faking this. Donny is this brilliant, master player who’s just vying for Devin’s sympathy because he’s on the block this week. I hate this. Donny is the best. Devin is the worst.
Soooooo… Nicole is freaking out in her bedroom because she’s pretty sure that there is a ghost living in it. I mean… She. Is. Freaking. Out. Jumping up in bed. Screaming. Christine begins to get scared as well. “I can’t be voted out if I’m dead. Dead by ghosts!” GOOD POINT CHRISTINE! They go to turn on the light, JUST TO MAKE SURE, because everyone knows that lights illuminate ghosts, and just before they do so, the door shuts. BY ITSELF! They both scream and run out of the room, telling the other houseguests what just happened. Someone goes “That’s how doors work I think.”
That was a fun distraction. BACK TO SAD DONNY STUFF! Donny’s telling everyone that back at home, he wears “tall drink of water socks”. He shows them his barren legs, where his tall socks have rubbed off all his leg hair. Innocent little story, right? Nope. “He’s ex-military” says Caleb. Army boots are what rubbed the hair off his legs. Devin agrees. Donny’s from the south. It’s America. You don’t wear fatigues unless you serve. Caleb suggests he’s an ex-SF killing machine. Devin says Navy SEAL. Private military. HO. LEE. $#!+. They are SO PARANOID. This is unbelievable! Later that night, Devin asks Donny if he is what he says he is. Nice vague question. Donny seems confused. Devin persists. “Absolutely”, Donny says. I can’t believe this. Donny is telling the truth and Devin is going to hold it against him. Donny said that he always wanted to be in the military, which is why he wears the fatigues, but he never was. He’s just a groundskeeper. He’ll prove it if he wins HoH. Donny’s slowly beginning to realize that Devin doesn’t fully trust him. About time. Devin says he’ll feel really bad if Donny’s telling the truth. WELL YEAH. “You’re a good guy Devin”, Donny says. “You too.” This is the first time the show has ever shown Devin having any second thoughts about his vendetta against Donny. Let’s hope he feels even more convicted before the week is out.
Uno, Dos, Tres, Quatro, Cinco, Cinco, Seis:
SLOP POPS! Time to find out which houseguests are going to be have-nots this week. Pow Pow doesn’t want to be a have-not because they have to eat slop, take cold showers “and also sleep in a uncomfortable bed, and I ain’t got time for that.” If you say so Pow Pow. Looks like Hayden, Cody, Brittany, and Joey have volunteered to be have-nots. Have-Nots? Is that something I should be capitalizing? Their have-nots room is pretty much a freezer. Everything’s covered in fake ice. Are those freezers stocked with slop pops? Those look pretty gross. Would you eat frozen oatmeal? Blech. They get to sleep on slabs of “ice” with emergency blankets. Sounds fun.
Joey, Amber, and Pow Pow are having a pow-wow. Looks like Joey wants to ressurect El Quatro! Remember that guys? Joey’s bringing it back! An all girl alliance including Amber, Brittany, Joey, Pow Pow, Jocasta… Uh, guys? El Quatro doesn’t work anymore. Have you thought about El Cinco? No? That’s not enough? Oh, because you want… uh… you want all eight girls in the alliance? Hmmm… Yeah, I’m not… sure… if that… is going to happen. Amber, incredibly, hasn’t blurted anything out about the Bomb Squad yet. It appears that she is actually remaining loyal to them. That’s a twist I did not see coming. With the way Amber and Christine reacted last week, I assumed that it was all a big joke to them, but apparently… the Bomb Squad is legit. Who knew? Of course, Amber could always commit to “El Quatro” or whatever they’re calling it and then play both alliances against one another. Like a smart person. But instead she’ll just remain silent. Which is fine too I guess, although she’s certainly being awkward about it. Derrick senses that something is up and calls a meeting. The Bomb Squad looks so smug. Amber goes to report her findings to Caleb, telling him that Joey is the one spear-heading the whole enterprise. Whoops. Caleb knew it was only a matter of time until another alliance started forming. Yeah, because yours was the first. Idiot.
Understandably, Joey has begun to feel like an outsider. Everyone’s walking on egg shells around her. No one will talk to her. So she decides that her best bet is to come clean… Huh. Maybe not her best move? She asks Devin to play chess with her. “Yeah, I’ll play chess with you” he says in the most monotone voice imaginable. Joey asks him why he’s pissed. Then she goes “So I tried to make an all-girl alliance. Is that why you’re mad?” and Devin’s all “Yeah, I know you did. And yeah, I’m pissed.” He tells her that everyone knows and that’s why nobody will talk to her. Devin thinks that Joey is the worst player in Big Brother history. Uh, Devin? Look in the mirror dude.
It’s almost time for the Veto competition and that means it’s time to pick players. You guys know how this works by now – The HoH and the two nominees each randomly draw three houseguests who will compete alongside them. Those three players are Victoria, The Douche!, and Cody. So that’s three Bomb Squad members versus the two nominees. And a princess. Caleb’s pretty confident that there’s no possible way Donny, Pow Pow, or Victoria are beating the Bomb Squad. Prove ‘em wrong Donny. Pow Pow certainly isn’t feeling good about her chances. And apparently it’s supposed to be “Pao-Pao” but I like my version better? Jocasta and Brittany are doing their best to comfort Pow Pow, but she just feels so intimidated by the people she has to compete against in the competition. I’d say that’s a fair response. Pow Pow’s never struck me as the most threatening player. So Jocasta prays for her and they joke around and she begins to feel better. It must be really nice having an inspirational speaker in the house.
Power of Veto Competition: “Miami Lice”
First Veto of the summer. Man, I love Big Brother challenges. Miami Lice? REALLY?! Love it. So great. SO GREAT. They’re all in colorful suits and sunglasses. The intro to this challenge is my favorite. It’ll be hard for Big Brother to top this one. There’s a big “bath-tub”. Inside it is a big head with a bunch of hair that’s filled with lettered “lice”. The houseguests have to jump into the tub, dive under the soapy brush, and go through the sudsy hair and water to find these lettered lice. They then carry one letter at a time back to their lice brush where they will attempt to spell a word. Any word. It just has to be correctly spelled. Whoever gets the longest word in the shortest amount of time wins (there’s also a time limit, but you can buzz in with a word before that in order to potentially have an advantage).
Victoria says that “This right here is nothing like Miami. Miami’s all about glamour, not LICE AND BUGS!” Aw, princess! I feel like maybe… Donny’s not going to be the best at spelling? But we’ll see. Zach’s got what looks like a brilliant strategy. You can only bring back one letter at a time, but he’s found a place to hide letters, so he just gathers them all up in this tube and then runs back and forth, depositing the letters on his brush. Cody has a different strategy. He can think of a lot of words that start with C, so he’s looking for a C. Hmmm. Okay. Good luck with that Co-HEY CODY STARTS WITH A C!!!! Meanwhile, Donny’s just… wow. He really marches to the beat of his own drummer, doesn’t he? No urgency whatsoever. He tells us that he was moving really slow so as to not wear himself out and to keep his thoughts. If he got soap in his eyes, he’d be done. Aaaaallllright Donny. Whatever suits you. Pow Pow has decided that the only word she can think of is “calculators”. Why? Where are they coming up with this stuff? Just find a bunch of letters then figure out a word. But what do I know, I’m just watching at home. The competition ends. Time for the results.
Zach spelled “Warning”. 7 letters long. Frankie takes issue with Zach’s word. “Not ‘Warnings’? It wasn’t even plural!”
Cody spelled “Competit… Competively”. Nice try there Cody.
Caleb spelled “S ECIALIZE”. Apparently he couldn’t find the P. The Bomb Squad kind of blew this one, huh? Christine says that initially she was so honoured to be asked to be a member of the Bomb Squad, but now she realizes that they just needed a person with a brain.
Victoria spelled “PHARMA IST”. Good job Victoria. Oh well, at least she didn’t try to spell “PRIN ESS”.
Pow Pow spelled… “Caltoru”. Caltoru. Caltoru. WHAT. Hayden (did anyone forget he was actually on this show?)
Donny spelled “Splitters”. Caleb mouths “splitters” with a confused look on his face. DONNY WINS! YES! AMAZING! “Fear the beard bugs!” #LuckyBeardDay. Donny may be dumb, but he can spell Splitters.
Caleb and Frankie respect that Donny won. So… Joey’s going up. Time for Joey to start campaigning. Caleb is expecting her visit. “You might have heard that I tried to start an all-girl alliance. It’s true and I’m sorry.” Caleb lays it out for her – You tried, and no one was on board, so you failed. Joey agrees. Caleb wants to let her know WHY she failed. “Because it’s way too early for that.” HAH. Great stuff. The difference between Caleb and Joey? “You just got caught”. At least Caleb appreciates that she came clean about it. What is this music? Is this Godfather music? Joey thinks that she’s made some progress. “Sorry for trying to plot against you”, Joey jokes. Oh Joey.
The last 5 minutes of a veto episode are always so boring because we all know what’s going to happen and they have to go through the entire spiel. Donny saves himself. Joey’s up. The end.
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Alright. I have to run to work. Episode 5 will be up tomorrow!!!